Ivana Separovic

On average, we take around 20,000 breaths a day. Over 70 years, that adds up to more than 500 million breaths.

And yet, most of the time, we barely notice them.

So today, let’s take a moment to appreciate our lungs for everything they do for us every single second, including right now.

Take a deep inhale through your nose and count to five. Then take one more short inhale at the top and hold for a moment.

Exhale slowly through your mouth and count to seven. Then exhale just a little bit more and pause before inhaling again.

Feel your lungs expanding and contracting, and quietly say thank you.

And notice this: how often does taking one deep inhale and exhale make things feel just a little bit better?

This morning, I read a passage in a book that really hit me.

It was a Buddhist story about two arrows.

The first arrow is pain.
Something difficult happens. Someone disappoints us, rejects us, criticises us. That arrow lands.

But then comes the second arrow.
The one that makes us suffer.

We feel alone, anxious, heartbroken.

“This always happens to me.”
“I’m not good enough.”
“Why can’t I handle this better?”
“What if things never improve?”

The first arrow comes from life.
The second one comes from our inner world. Our thoughts, emotions, reactions.

And while we cannot always control the first arrow, we can learn to soften the second.

The story reminded me that suffering is not always created by what happens to us.
It is often our response to those events that can make us feel miserable.

And this is the power of books.

Sometimes a single paragraph can change the way we see ourselves, our pain, or our entire lives.

And I think that’s pretty beautiful.

Today, I am grateful for books. 🙏🏼

Years ago, I witnessed a moment on the grassy area near our apartment, one of those places always full of kids, families, and dogs.

That day, I noticed a girl, about 12 years old, doing cartwheels in front of her dad.

Each time she called out, “Hey Dad, look at this.”
She would do a cartwheel, then look at him, waiting for his reaction.

Every time, he barely responded. Just a quick glance before returning to his conversation with friends.

By the third time, I noticed her face.

She looked hurt. Disappointed. A little humiliated.

I think many of us know that feeling. Wanting to be seen. Wanting to hear “I’m proud of you,” and not receiving it.

When it happens often enough, it can make us feel unworthy of their time and attention.
It can make us believe our voice doesn’t matter—that no matter what we do, it’s not enough.

👉Since becoming a mum, it has become one of my highest priorities to spend meaningful time with Lucia—to be as present as I can, so she knows she matters.

Because when we are truly present with our children, without saying a word, we communicate:
You matter. You are worthy. You are important. I love you.

Our children need our presence more than our presents.

People often tell me:
“I can’t stop thinking. I can’t meditate.”

My answer is always the same:
Me neither. That’s not the point.

I like to explain it with an analogy.

Imagine you have a very talkative flatmate. They never stop talking. They jump from one topic to another. Sometimes they complain, judge, criticise, or comment on everything.

It can feel overwhelming.

Most of the time, you sit there listening closely and reacting to everything they say. You get annoyed, anxious, ashamed, embarrassed… their words pull you in emotionally.

But one day you realise something important.

You have a choice.

You can’t make them stop talking.
And you probably can’t kick them out.

But you can stop giving them your constant attention.

You still hear them talking, but you don’t react to every word anymore. Their voice is there, but it no longer controls how you feel.

Instead, you notice something else.

The sound of a bird outside.
Your breath moving in and out.
Your lungs expanding and contracting.

And suddenly you feel a little freer. A little more in control.

That’s what meditation really is.

We’re not trying to stop our thoughts. That’s impossible. Thoughts arise from places beyond our conscious mind.

What we practice is something different:
being in their presence without reacting to them.

We notice them.
Let them pass.
And gently bring our attention back to the breath.

It’s a powerful skill.

Because once you learn it, you can use it anytime — when your mind is racing, when you feel overwhelmed, or when you simply need to ground yourself.

So remember:
You don’t have to stop your thoughts.

You only need to learn how to respond to them.

56 Days of Gratitude – Day 1

A friend of mine said the other day, “Positivity is always welcome.” It made me feel warm and fuzzy inside. Without realizing it, he inspired me to share a bit of positivity with the world every week.

We live in times when it’s all too easy to notice what’s wrong. And there are many things in this world that do feel wrong. But noticing what’s good—that takes effort.

Today, I’m grateful for something simple, yet so important: photographs.