Finding Strength in Autism

💙 Sometimes Autism Looks Like This…

Sometimes Mom is tired too.

Not just “I need a nap” tired.

The kind of tired that comes from carrying the mental load, the appointments, the therapies, the advocating, the worrying, the working, and all the little things nobody else sees.

And sometimes, Mom just needs to stop.

So she rests her head on her daughter.

And for a moment, they hold each other. ❤️

Her daughter may need Mom to be her safe place—but Mom needs a safe place too.

There is something incredibly beautiful about a relationship where comfort goes both ways.

No words.
No expectations.
No fixing anything.

Just a tired mom resting on her daughter…
and a daughter who is perfectly happy to let her. 🥹💙

Special-needs motherhood can be exhausting. But these quiet moments remind us that we don’t have to be strong every second. Sometimes we can simply rest in the people we love.

💙

One of the hardest parts of being a special-needs mother is the isolation.

I’m a single mother of two daughters with special needs. I work full-time, carry the largest majority of our financial responsibilities, and manage the endless behind-the-scenes work that keeps our lives functioning.

The phone calls.
The appointments.
The paperwork.
The therapy.
The transportation.
The school communication.
The scheduling.
The advocating.
The planning.
The bills.
The constant problem-solving.

And when there’s something I can’t physically do because I have to work, I pay for help.

I pay for a caregiver.
I pay for transportation.
I pay for the support that allows me to work and financially support my family.

That help isn’t a luxury. It’s what makes it possible for me to keep working.

And sometimes I’m just exhausted.

People ask, “Why don’t you go out?”

Sometimes I want to.

Sometimes I even make plans.

But when the day comes, I realize I have nothing left.

It’s not that I don’t want to go.

I’m simply depleted.

That’s the part people don’t see.

They see me working. They see me functioning. They see me taking care of my girls.

They don’t see what it takes to keep everything moving.

They don’t see the mental load.

They don’t see the financial load.

They don’t see how much of myself goes into making sure everyone else is okay.

And somewhere along the way, I became lonely.

I have friends. I have people who care about me.

But my life doesn’t operate like everyone else’s.

I can’t always make plans.

I can’t always leave.

I can’t always say yes.

And sometimes friendships fade because people don’t understand that my “no” isn’t rejection.

Sometimes I’m just running on empty.

I love my girls more than anything in this world.

But loving my children doesn’t mean I don’t get lonely.

It doesn’t mean I don’t need people.

It doesn’t mean I don’t need to be cared for, too.

I’m still a woman underneath the role of “Mom.”

I still want friendship.

Laughter.

Connection.

A life outside of appointments, therapy, work, bills, caregiving, transportation, and responsibilities.

I don’t want to spend my life simply surviving.

I want to live, too.

So if you’re another single, special-needs mother who feels isolated and exhausted, I want you to know:

I see you.

I hear you.

You’re not failing.

You’re carrying an enormous amount.

And you are not alone.

Waiting for the bus ❤️

🚨 PARENTS—PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOUR NEXT IEP MEETING. 🚨

I bring a team with me to every IEP meeting.

And guess what?

YOU CAN TOO.

You do not have to walk into that room alone. You can bring people who know your child, understand their needs, support you, or can help you advocate.

But more importantly…

KNOW YOUR RIGHTS. KNOW THE LAW. KNOW YOUR CHILD.

I cannot tell you how many times I have had to fight for supports my children needed.

Nearly every year, there has been something I’ve had to push for, question, challenge, or advocate for.

And I’ve learned something very important along the way:

You cannot assume that the school will automatically do what is best for your child.

That doesn’t mean every teacher, administrator, or school is bad. It means you cannot hand over your responsibility as your child’s advocate and hope everything works out.

YOU know your child.

YOU see what happens at home.

YOU know their abilities, struggles, triggers, strengths, communication, behaviors, and needs.

And YOU are the person who has to speak up when something doesn’t make sense.

Some schools may not follow the rules. Some may interpret the rules differently. Some may assume parents won’t question them.

And sometimes…parents simply don’t know what they are entitled to ask for.

Education is power.

If your district offers IEP trainings, parent trainings, advocacy workshops, or special education information sessions—GO!

I have attended many over the years, and they have helped me tremendously.

Learn the terminology.
Read the IEP.
Ask questions.
Request data.
Document conversations.
Put important things in writing.
And don’t be afraid to say, “Can you show me where that is in the law or my child’s IEP?”

And above all…

COMMUNICATE.

Keep the lines of communication open with your child’s school. Advocacy doesn’t have to mean fighting every single person in the room.

But it DOES mean being willing to stand your ground when something isn’t right.

Schools have budgets. They have staffing issues. They have limited resources.

But your child’s needs don’t disappear because resources are limited.

Sometimes you have to push. Sometimes you have to ask again. Sometimes you have to bring people with you. And sometimes you have to fight battles you never imagined you would have to fight.

But please…

DON’T GIVE UP.

Your child may not be able to sit at that table and advocate for themselves.

So be their voice. ❤️

And if you’re a parent who is overwhelmed by the IEP process, know this:

You are not alone.

We learn.
We educate ourselves.
We ask questions.
We support each other.
And we keep showing up.

Because our children are worth fighting for. ❤️

— Finding Strength in Autism

Autism Hero Walk - Detroit - 2026 This fundraiser benefits Autism Alliance of Michigan and includes an autism marketplace, on-stage program, united community walk, arts and crafts, and entertainment for all ages.

Having some fun today. Riding in style from ABA therapy. They had so much fun