Kristen Scott Music

When I lost Ira to su***de, so much of my own history that I thought I had dealt with and healed from came back with a force I wasn’t prepared for. I thought I had finally found the love and security I had spent much of my life searching for. Then su***de shattered that sense of safety too.

Suddenly I wasn’t grieving only the man I loved. I was confronting layers of trauma that reached much further back, the sexual abuse, dysfunctional and abusive relationships, substance use, fear of abandonment and all the ways I had learned to survive before I ever understood that I was surviving.

That is why mental health awareness matters to me.

September is a time when su***de prevention receives particular attention. But su***de prevention also requires us to understand what can exist beneath a person’s pain: trauma, abuse, addiction, grief, depression, shame and experiences they may have carried silently for decades.

Ribbons is my story. But the reason I share it is because these experiences are not mine alone.

If you are thinking about su***de or are worried about someone, in Canada you can call or text 9-8-8 for the Su***de Crisis Helpline, 24/7.

Trauma does not always stay neatly in the past. It can return through relationships, loss, rejection, grief or situations that make the body remember what the mind has spent years trying to survive.

When I lost Ira to su***de, so much of my own history that I thought I had dealt with and healed from came back with a force I wasn’t prepared for. I thought I had finally found the love and security I had spent much of my life searching for. Then su***de shattered that sense of safety too.

Suddenly I wasn’t grieving only the man I loved. I was confronting layers of trauma that reached much further back, the sexual abuse, dysfunctional and abusive relationships, substance use, fear of abandonment and all the ways I had learned to survive before I ever understood that I was surviving.

That is why mental health awareness matters to me.

September is a time when su***de prevention receives particular attention, with World Su***de Prevention Day on September 10. But su***de prevention also requires us to understand what can exist beneath a person’s pain: trauma, abuse, addiction, grief, depression, shame and experiences they may have carried silently for decades.

Ribbons is my story. But the reason I share it is because these experiences are not mine alone.

If you are thinking about su***de or are worried about someone, in Canada you can call or text 9-8-8 for the Su***de Crisis Helpline, 24/7.

Sunday Reflection:

I simply cannot look at my life, all I’ve survived, learned, lost and been given, and not acknowledge Him. 🤍

I don’t love God because life has been easy. I love God because I’ve seen Him meet me in the hardest places and carry me through things I never thought I could survive.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.” — Isaiah 41:10 🤍

My faith doesn’t erase the pain, grief, or uncertainty. It reminds me that I was never walking through any of it alone.

Su***de changes the way you understand and experience loss.

Years can pass, yet the shock can remain. When someone you love dies by su***de, especially unexpectedly, it can shatter your sense of safety and leave you questioning everything.

In the aftermath, grief becomes intertwined with uncertainty. Su***de loss is not only learning to live without someone, it is learning to live again after the security you once felt has been broken. Nothing feels guaranteed, and that uncertainty can deeply affect your mental health.

For me, healing has meant gradually finding my way through that uncertainty and surrounding myself with the people, places and things I love, things that lift me up, keep me hopeful and remind me that life is beautiful and a gift. It means choosing to see life through love, gratitude, joy and hope, even when part of me is still afraid to trust it.

***deawarenessprevention ***depreventionmonth

This is the segment of my interview today with CTV News. We talked about my song, “I Feel Nothing, Nothing At All” and the importance of raising awareness around mental illness and su***de. This was a hard one.🙏❤️