JOHN NDUTA.

Instead of Bíble G0d to use his power and command hair to grow on Elisha's head, he sent wild beasts to kíll 42 children because they made móckery of Elisha's bald hair. Well, this is the word of the lord, thanks be to G0d

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This is why women live longer than men

A WOMAN'S PHONE INBOX

MOSE: i love you gal.
MPESA: You have received 3,500 from
Martin Juma. Your balance is
Ksh11,550
ALEX: i miss you baby gal
TONNY: are you free i take you for
dinner today?
SAFARICOM: you have received
300shs airtime.
OMOSH: I want to take you to Diani
this weekend.
MPESA: you have received 5,100 from
ALEX KENGA. Your balance is 16,650.
FREDDY: I want to buy you pizza
today, and btw will you be my
valentine?

A MAN'S PHONE INBOX

CATE: pliz nisambazie credo
SAFARICOM: Dear Customer you have
insufficient funds. Please top up to
continue.
ANITA: woishe nibuyie lunch.
HOUSE AGENT: Nimekupa mpaka
kesho, ulipe nyumba ama niweke
kufuli.
SAFARICOM: You will not be able to
access Okoa Jahazi for the next 14
days due to late payment.
NJERI: Please call me. Thank you.
SAFARICOM: Okoa Jahazi debt
recovered as follows; Main account
0.04 KSH, Balance:49.95 KSH.
SHYLOCK: K**a umeshindwa kulipa
pesa yangu nitauza Hii laptop yako
kesho.
NANCY: Tuheshimiane nimeolewa
CARO: Eeehhh...nime move on
MAMA MBOGA: Pesa ya jana haikuingia
MERCY : Birthday yangu ni kesho ...ninunulie chocolate, afya 2litres na cake ya 2kg na ikue na candlesticks ndio nijue uko serious
MSHWARI: please repay your loan
before 30th or else
HUSTLERFUND: Dear Customer, you have an overdue Hustler Fund loan of KES 800...
SPORTPESA: Oyaa! Uko na 99 bob?
Win 400 million SportPesa Mega Jackpot, lipwa instantly...

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

The person who broke into my house, I want to let you know that your phone fell out of your pocket and it is with me. Your Facebook account is open and all your details are in my hands.
‎
‎I am giving you a chance to return everything you stole.
‎
‎By the way see this is the Facebook account... maybe someone will recognize them ??:https://www.facebook.com/profile.php

Watu wa siaka siaka nko na hizi vitu kamoja ni mia😁🤣

Because close-distance love is daily spending, and long-distance love is occasional spending.

When you live in the same city, the costs are constant and small but they never stop. Dinner this Friday, movie next Friday, Ubers to see each other, a quick coffee that turns into lunch, new clothes so you don't look repetitive. A 2026 survey found the average first date alone now costs $93 in the US, and 76% of people said food and drink costs on dates cause them financial stress.

Long-distance removes almost all of that. You don't have spontaneous "let's go eat somewhere" on a Wednesday. You don't need a new outfit every weekend. You don't pay for daily transport to see each other. Yes, you do have travel - flights or buses can run $1,500 to $2,200 per year on average - but if you divide that by 12 months, it's still cheaper than eating out twice a week for a whole year.

That's why it feels like a secret saving hack. You're forced to replace spending with data bundles and video calls. Studies show long-distance couples actually communicate 4x more than close couples because they have to. So you save money and end up talking more.

It's not that LDRs are free - 42% of people in them say travel strains them financially. It's that the costs are predictable and infrequent, while local dating costs are unpredictable and everyday, and those everyday costs are what drain your account before payday.
:::follow_up_prompts {"items":[{"text":"How much does local dating really cost vs LDR per month?"},{"text":"What are the hidden downsides of LDRs beyond travel?"},{"text":"How do couples budget for LDR travel without stress?"}]}:::