My Vocation Guide

THE PRIESTHOOD IS A CALL, NOT A FAMILY OR SOCIETAL PROJECT

The priesthood is a call. It is not a path someone should enter simply because people have told him that he would make a good priest. It is not something a person should choose because he believes that life outside the priesthood will be difficult for him. And it is certainly not something parents should force their children to choose simply because they want a priest in the family.

Priesthood should be something a man genuinely desires to consider for himself. He should freely be willing to ask himself whether he can give his life to God and serve His people as a priest. This desire may grow stronger with time, especially through prayer, guidance and formation, but there should at least be some personal openness to the possibility. It should not be a decision made mainly because of family pressure, society or other people's expectations.

In the situation we are discussing, this young man does not even have the slightest desire to become a priest. Yet he has been pressured into believing that if he does not become a priest, he will not amount to anything meaningful in life.

That is a dangerous way to approach vocation.

I know people who initially did not feel strongly about becoming priests but eventually entered the seminary and became very good priests. Such experiences are real, and we should not ignore them. But we also should not use those experiences to generalise about everyone.

This is a young man who will soon be 30. If, after all these years, he genuinely has no desire to become a priest, we should not simply tell him that he must become one because other people believe it is the best thing for him.

Many seminarians enter the seminary because of similar pressure. Unfortunately, the pressure does not always stop after admission. In some cases, it becomes even stronger. Family members, friends and even people within the Church may begin to expect the person to continue at all costs. At that point, leaving the seminary can feel like failure, disappointment or even a rejection of God.

This can create a serious problem.

We may eventually have priests who are not truly happy or fulfilled in their ministry. They may carry deep regrets because they chose the priesthood mainly to satisfy other people's expectations. And when a priest is struggling with such feelings for many years, the people he serves may also feel the consequences.

The Church needs priests who are happy to serve, zealous in their ministry and convinced that they have freely offered their lives to God. We should not deliberately push people into a life that they do not want and then expect them to remain joyful in it for the rest of their lives.

The priesthood is also not an ordinary contract job. It is not something you enter for a few years and later abandon simply because you have changed your mind about the lifestyle. It is a serious commitment that affects the whole of a person's life. That is why the decision to enter it deserves honesty, freedom and careful discernment.

A genuine vocation should not be built mainly on pressure from parents, relatives or society. The young man himself must be an important and free participant in the decision. He must be able to say, in his own heart, that this is a life he is willing to consider and embrace.

So, please, stop forcing young men to consider the priesthood by telling them that they will not achieve anything meaningful if they do not become priests.

There are many meaningful ways to serve God and humanity. Not every young man is called to the priesthood, and not becoming a priest does not make anyone a failure.

To young men who are discerning their future, take time to ask yourself honest questions. Where can you find purpose? Where can you serve others well? Where can you use your gifts meaningfully? What kind of life can you freely commit yourself to?

If you do not believe that the priesthood is a life you can genuinely embrace, do not allow yourself to be forced into it simply to satisfy other people's expectations.

The priesthood is too sacred and too demanding to be chosen merely because someone else wants you to become a priest.

A FORCED VOCATION IS NOT TRUE VOCATION

©️My Vocation Guide

A FORCED VOCATION IS NOT A VOCATION

I received this message from a young man. Please read his message carefully and advise him accordingly in the comments. I will share my own reaction later.

"Please, I need your help. I am from Imo State. As it stands now, I don't know what the future holds for me. There have been several revelations about me that I am supposed to be a priest. Some of the ministers who gave these revelations are not even Catholics, yet their message has always been the same. They said they saw me dressed as a priest.”

“The issue I am having is that I don't desire or have the hunger to be a priest. It is not something I see myself going into. However, the repeated prophecies about me have now left me confused. I honestly don't know what to do.”

“I want to become a businessman, get married, and have children. Even with the pressure I am facing that I am supposed to be a priest, if I were to enter the seminary now, I know I would have heavy regrets while I am there.”

“Do I desire to get closer to God? Yes. But not as a priest.”

“Please, what should I do?"

What advice would you give this young man?

Kindly share your thoughts respectfully in the comments. I will read through them and later give my own reaction to his situation.

A MESSAGE TO EVERY YOUNG MAN WHO WANTS TO BECOME A CATHOLIC PRIEST

Many young people in Nigeria who desire to discern the Catholic priesthood, especially those who have just completed their secondary school education, are already thinking of applying to religious congregations or sitting for entrance examinations into diocesan seminaries. Hundreds of them have reached out to me asking to be guided on how to gain admission into the seminary.

As we all know, the priesthood is a call from God, and no one can say with absolute certainty that he has been called. That is why discernment in the seminary is very important. Every young man who wishes to discern the priesthood should prepare himself for whatever outcome the process may bring. Not everyone who enters the seminary is eventually ordained. Some leave willingly, while others are withdrawn from formation as the process of discernment unfolds.

Today, many religious congregations are not only looking for young men who desire to become priests. They are also looking for young men who can add value and solve practical problems. That is why I strongly encourage you to learn a skill immediately after your secondary school education, or even while you are still in school. Learn a skill that can remain useful throughout your life.

You can learn digital skills, or practical skills such as barbing, fashion designing, plumbing, painting, computer operation, electrical work, and many others. Personally, I recommend fashion designing and computer operation because they are skills you can continue to use wherever life takes you.

As someone who wants to become a Catholic priest, the only qualification attached to your name should not be your WAEC or NECO result with credits in English, Mathematics and CRS. Religious congregations are increasingly asking practical questions: What problem can you solve? What skill do you have that can contribute to the mission of the congregation? Apart from the priesthood, what can you do to earn a living? Are you treating the priesthood as your only escape route?

A young man who learns tailoring can comfortably build a life outside the seminary if, after years of formation, he discovers that the priesthood is not his vocation. Someone who learns barbing can open a barbing salon and begin life again if he leaves the seminary. Even while he is still in formation, such a skill can be of great benefit to the seminary community.

Think about yourself. If, after several years in the seminary, you discover that the priesthood is not your calling, will you be confident enough to leave? Or will you remain simply because you are afraid of how you will survive outside? This is one of the reasons why learning a skill is very important today. We have seen many young men lose direction after leaving the seminary because they had no practical skill to fall back on.

It is not compulsory to learn a skill before applying to a religious congregation or diocese. However, I believe it is one of the best decisions you can make. Before rushing to write your application letter, consider spending a few months learning a skill and becoming good at it. You do not have to enter the seminary immediately after secondary school. Learn something useful, prepare yourself for life, and then allow God to guide your journey wherever He leads you.

May God bless your aspirations.

A LETTER TO YOUNG MEN WHO HAVE BEEN APPLYING FOR ADMISSION INTO RELIGIOUS CONGREGATIONS/DIOCESES

When Samuel graduated from secondary school, he decided to explore the vocation of becoming a Catholic ministerial priest. He applied for admission in his local diocese and took the entrance examination, but unfortunately, he did not make it to the admission list.

Undeterred, Samuel tried again the following year, this time applying to a religious congregation. However, he faced another disappointment as he was not admitted, despite his impressive academic record from a renowned secondary school in his hometown. Concerned about his future, Samuel confided in an older friend who advised him to consider pursuing further studies in a tertiary institution.

Taking this advice to heart, Samuel discussed the matter with his parents. The question now arose: What course should he study considering his aspirations? Samuel knew that before being ordained a Catholic priest, he would be required to study Philosophy and theology. Therefore, he decided that he would pursue a degree in Philosophy at a university before proceeding to study for the priesthood in the seminary.

However, before Samuel applied to study a course, he had a meeting with a seminarian who was on apostolic work in Samuel's parish. During the meeting, Samuel shared his plans with the seminarian. Drawing upon his extensive knowledge of the Catholic Priesthood vocation, the seminarian offered advice to Samuel. He stated that it was not a bad idea for Samuel to study at a university while still considering the possibility of discerning a priestly vocation in the future. The seminarian also mentioned that studying Philosophy would be a suitable choice for Samuel's aspirations. However, he emphasized that before being ordained a priest, it is necessary to undergo courses in both Philosophy and theology.

Therefore, it is not necessary for Samuel to study Philosophy at a secular or any other institution before proceeding to the Seminary.
In addition, “I have noticed that 80 out of 100 congregations and dioceses do not accept young men who have obtained a Philosophy graduate degree from secular universities or institutions outside their specific formation program. Given this information, I would strongly recommend that you consider studying alternative courses such as Psychology, History, Languages and Linguistics, or English Studies instead. Having a degree in one of these fields would for the most part give you an edge over someone who has studied philosophy. From my perspective, it is important to make this choice wisely.

Nevertheless, it is important to note that obtaining a degree in Philosophy does not diminish one's value or detract from their consideration for admission into a congregation or diocese for priesthood formation. In some cases, individuals with a Philosophy degree may have a shorter formation period compared to those without, and they may eventually be ordained Catholic priests. However, it is rare for individuals who have obtained a Philosophy degree from a secular institution outside of the Seminary to be admitted in some congregations and dioceses.

Considering the uncertainty of the future, it would be wise to consider pursuing another course of study in your area of interest or specialization, in case you no longer wish to pursue a path towards becoming a Catholic priest. While I am not discouraging you from pursuing a degree in Philosophy, it is important to be aware of the implications and potential limitations of this choice, as well as other courses of study, before entering the Seminary”
Samuel had a good time discussing with the Seminarian who shared some experiences and encounters he has had in the Seminary over time, the misconceptions he had harbored about the Seminary and the reality he encountered, things he had expected and things he got.

After the discussion, Samuel immersed himself in a deep thought on which course to study and placing the advantages side by side, it was evident that studying a different course other than philosophy was the better option. He discussed with his parents who seem to rely hook, line and sinker on what the seminarian had said. His father then judging from what the seminarian had said encouraged Samuel to choose another course other than philosophy. Samuel decided to apply for Languages and Linguistics. Ultimately, he was successful, and was admitted into the program.

He studied the course for four good years and graduated with a second class upper degree and since he still harbored the aspirations of discerning the priesthood, he applied for admission into a religious congregation in his state, this time around not as someone who had just graduated from secondary school but a graduate with a second class upper degree in Languages and Linguistics. He was admitted for formation towards the ministerial priesthood and having studied for a considerate period of time, he was raised to the order of the presbyterate. His qualification as a linguist gave him much advantage to work as a religious priest in his country. Samuel serves as a Roman Catholic priest to this day!

DEAR ASPIRANT TO THE CATHOLIC PRIESTHOOD,

It's hight time we stopped putting so much emphasis on the idea of "From secondary school straight to the Seminary." Getting into a congregation or diocese right after secondary school shouldn't be the only path. Just like Samuel in our story, there is value in going to university first though not always . Some might argue that if you go to university, you might change your mind about becoming a priest, but that just shows that priesthood is truly not your calling. The notion that only a special group of people are meant to be priests is completely false.

Anyone can become a priest if they have the sincere desire and enthusiasm for it. However, not everyone who sincerely wants to become a priest actually ends up becoming a priest and conversely not everyone who is a priest initially had that strong desire to be one.

Now here is the crux of this article. It has gotten to my notice that the Joint Admission and Matriculation Board (JAMB) has initiated the sale of forms for individuals seeking admission into tertiary institutions. I strongly advise that you acquire a JAMB form and apply to pursue a course that you believe would be highly advantageous to you, both in your capacity as a priest and as a lay person. This means selecting a course that would enable you to provide for yourself and your family if you choose to marry, or a course that would also be beneficial to you in your role as a priest. It is very pertinent not to find yourself in a situation like that of the applicant who repeatedly applies but becomes disheartened without being admitted or acquiring tertiary education or any valuable cm lucrative skill.

The truth is that some people can get admitted into the seminary either through a religious congregation or diocese immediately after secondary school but some people won't.
Don't be like the guy who kept applying for admission into a religious congregation or diocese even when his father offered to pay his school fees at the tertiary level so the young man could study any course. The young man was hesitant and never a gave a considerate look in that dimension until his father died and he ended up losing on both sides. Don't put your eggs in one basket.

He has not been admitted into any congregation or diocese and he has not attended any tertiary institution. He has nobody that can assume such responsibility of taking care of his fees. All these while, he has regretted the decision he made years back. Right now, he is a teacher in a primary school with a very meagre salary. Most of you have parents or guardians that are willing to sponsor you through tertiary education but it seems you have made it a hobby to apply from one congregation and diocese to the other each year without consideration of your future. It's not a prayer but, it could be that such people won't be around someday to pay for your education or carter for your needs and you would probably end up in regret. Sapere Aude !
Please make hay while the sun shines!
Best regards 💜,

©️The Seminary Dude

WHEN PEOPLE KEEP TELLING YOU THAT YOU SHOULD BE A PRIEST

In many African communities today, especially within the Church, it is very common for young men who are active in parish life to be constantly reminded that they “look like future priests.” Once a young man is prayerful, committed in church activities, active in the choir, altar service, or prayer groups, people around him often begin to assume that priesthood must naturally be his calling.

Sometimes these remarks come from lay faithful, parish elders, family members, catechists, religious sisters, and even priests themselves. Statements like “you will make a good priest,” “God is calling you,” or “we are seeing a future priest in you” are often repeated so frequently that the young man gradually begins to feel emotionally and psychologically pressured, even when he is personally uncertain within himself.

It must be admitted that many genuine vocations have truly begun from such remarks and encouragement. There are priests today whose initial interest in priesthood was awakened because somebody noticed certain qualities in them and encouraged them to think seriously about vocation. So such comments are not always wrong or meaningless.

However, this should not be turned into a general rule or an indirect form of pressure. A young man being prayerful or active in church does not automatically mean he is called to priesthood. Sometimes it simply means he is a serious Christian who loves the Church and is committed to his faith. The Church does not only need priests. It also needs responsible husbands, disciplined fathers, honest professionals, committed teachers, faithful Catholics, and morally upright men who will contribute positively to society and family life.

Unfortunately, in many African settings, when a young man who was once considered “priestly” no longer shows interest in seminary, people quickly begin to attach unnecessary interpretations to his decision. Some assume he has become too interested in women, too worldly, spiritually unserious, or secretly involved in immoral relationships. In some places, a young man may even begin to fear disappointing people more than disappointing himself. Because of this fear of judgment and backlash, some continue with seminary formation even when they already suspect deeply within themselves that priesthood may not truly be their calling.

This creates a dangerous situation because priesthood should not be entered mainly to satisfy public expectation or maintain a certain image before people. A young man cannot safely build his entire future on the opinions, excitement, or emotional projections of others. External encouragement can help discernment, but it should never replace personal conviction, sincere reflection, and honest prayer.

Some young men enter seminary more because people have emotionally positioned them there than because they freely and sincerely chose it themselves. After entering, they remain not necessarily because they are convinced, but because leaving would attract questions, disappointment, gossip, or embarrassment from people who had earlier celebrated them as “future priests.” This kind of psychological pressure is unhealthy for discernment.

A vocation should involve personal willingness and interior conviction, not silent coercion. Young men should be free enough to ask themselves difficult questions honestly without fear of being judged by society. It is better for a person to discern sincerely before entering than to continue living under pressure simply to preserve people’s expectations.

A young man should pray seriously and ask God where he can genuinely be fruitful with his life. That answer may lead to priesthood, marriage, religious life, or another honest path of Christian commitment. But whatever path he eventually chooses should not rest merely on the constant remarks of people around him. Vocational discernment becomes unhealthy once fear of public opinion becomes stronger than personal sincerity before God.

A YOUNG MAN SHOULD NOT BECOME A PRIEST MERELY BECAUSE PEOPLE EXPECT IT.

YOU MAY ADMIRE PRIESTS AND STILL NOT BE CALLED TO THE PRIESTHOOD

One of the common mistakes many young men make during vocational discernment is assuming that admiration for priests automatically means a call to priesthood. In reality, admiration and vocation are not always the same thing. A person may sincerely respect priests, love the Church, enjoy serving at the altar, and still not be called to become a priest himself.

In many African societies for instance, priests are highly respected. People see the way they celebrate Mass, preach, wear the cassock, bless people, and occupy important positions in the Church. Young boys naturally grow up admiring such figures. Sometimes, a young man may admire the discipline, intelligence, confidence, simplicity, or public honour associated with priesthood. None of these things are wrong in themselves, but admiration alone is not yet vocation.

At the same time, it must also be acknowledged that many genuine priestly vocations have gradually grown from such admiration. The Church has had good and sincere priests whose interest in priesthood first began through admiration for the life and example of another priest. Sometimes, the good example of a dedicated priest can awaken serious vocational thoughts in a young person. So, this is not in anyway an attempt to simply dismiss admiration as meaningless.

However, admiration alone is still not enough to conclude that one is called. A genuine vocation goes deeper than attraction to appearances or inspiration from personalities. It touches the person’s inner disposition towards sacrifice, service, responsibility, obedience, and spiritual commitment. Many people admire successful doctors, lawyers, soldiers, or musicians without feeling personally called to become one. In the same way, a person may admire priests deeply and still be more suited for another path in life.

In many places today, especially within African society, young men who are prayerful, committed in church activities, active in the choir, altar service, or other parish groups are often viewed automatically as “future priests.” Sometimes this expectation even comes from parents, parishioners, priests, and fellow youths. As a result, some young men gradually begin to feel pressured into thinking that because they love the Church or admire priests, they must necessarily have a vocation to priesthood.

But things are not always that simple. A person can sincerely love the Church, enjoy prayer, participate actively in parish life, and still not be called to become a priest. The Church does not only need good and committed priests. It also needs responsible fathers, mature husbands, honest professionals, dedicated teachers, committed catechists, disciplined leaders, and sincere Christian men who will positively influence society through their various vocations and responsibilities.

This is why discernment should be approached with all manner of honesty. Some young men are attracted mainly by the image of priesthood without seriously reflecting on the demands attached to it. They imagine the respect priests receive but do not think carefully about the sacrifices, emotional demands, discipline, loneliness, and responsibilities involved in priestly life. Priesthood is not merely about standing on the altar or wearing clerical clothing. Much of priestly life involves hidden responsibilities, patience, personal discipline, and constant availability to people. Do not take this as a threat.

There are also cases where admiration grows from personal experiences. A young man may have encountered a good priest who inspired him deeply through kindness, intelligence, humility, or simplicity of life. Such experiences can positively influence discernment, but inspiration alone should not be mistaken for certainty of vocation. Sometimes admiration simply means that a person has encountered a good example worthy of respect and imitation as a Christian.

This is why discernment requires patience and sincerity. A person should ask deeper questions beyond admiration. Am I attracted only to the image of priesthood or to the life itself? Am I willing to accept the sacrifices attached to it? Is this desire growing from within sincerely, or is it mostly emotional excitement and external attraction?

A young man should not pressure himself simply because he admires priests. Respecting priests is good. Learning from them is good. Being inspired by them is good. But vocation is something more personal and demanding. It requires deeper conviction, inner peace, and gradual clarity that develops with time, prayer, honest reflection, and proper guidance.

SIGNS THAT YOU MAY NOT YET BE READY FOR SEMINARY

A serious vocation to the priesthood is not just about desire, admiration, or the fact that one has been attending Mass regularly. Many young men are attracted to the priesthood for different reasons, but attraction alone is not the same as readiness. Seminary is a place of formation, yes, but there are also deeper matters that should already be present before a man steps into that path. If these things are missing, it may mean he is not yet ready, even if he is still spiritually interested.

One clear sign is when the desire for priesthood is built mostly on external things. Some are drawn by the respect priests receive, the clean image of the clerical life, the honour attached to the collar, or the idea of being seen as important in the Church. When the attraction is mainly about status, image, or escaping ordinary life, that is a strong sign that the heart has not yet reached the right place. Priesthood is service, sacrifice, and hidden fidelity, not a platform for self-importance.

Another sign is a deep resistance to obedience and correction. Seminary life is not perfect, and no young man enters already fully formed. But there is a difference between a person who is still growing and a person who cannot submit to guidance at all. If a man already has a hardened spirit, cannot accept authority, cannot listen, and always wants to do things his own way, that is not a small matter. Such a person may struggle badly in seminary because priestly life itself depends heavily on obedience, humility, and teachability.

A more serious sign is the presence of a double life. This is not about ordinary weakness or human struggle that can be corrected with time. It is about a person who consistently lives in pretence, hiding who he is, saying one thing and doing another, and refusing to live with honesty before God and man. Seminary cannot be built on deception. A man who is not truthful with himself, with his superiors, or with the Church is still standing on unsafe ground.

There is also the issue of inner stability. Some young men are not yet ready because their emotional life is still too unstable, too reactive, or too deeply broken for the demands of priestly formation. If a person is constantly controlled by anger, bitterness, deep resentment, or uncontrolled impulses, and he has no serious desire or capacity to change, then he may need more maturity before entering. Seminary is not a place for pretending that everything is fine. A man must have enough self-control and inner order to begin the journey meaningfully.

Another important sign is when a person does not truly love prayer, silence, and spiritual discipline. It is one thing to admire priestly robes, titles, or altar service; it is another thing to enjoy being alone with God, to stay faithful in prayer, and to live a disciplined spiritual life. A man who avoids prayer, resists spiritual seriousness, and only appears religious in public may not yet be ready. The priesthood is sustained by a real relationship with God, not by religious appearance.

A young man may also not yet be ready if he is still running from life rather than responding to a call. Some people begin to think about seminary because they are tired of confusion, tired of struggle, tired of the world, or tired of not knowing what else to do. But priesthood should not be used as an escape route. If a man is entering mainly because he feels lost, pressured, or afraid of ordinary responsibility, then he may need more time to understand himself before making such a serious move.

Some young men considering the priesthood may genuinely mean well and still not be ready for seminary yet. There are stages in life where certain attitudes, intentions, or personal dispositions can make seminary formation difficult from the beginning. It is better for a person to admit he is not yet ready than to enter formation unprepared and struggle with realities he was never disposed for in the first place. Honesty during discernment deserves more respect than unnecessary haste or pretence.