KittyPlays

Is it too early to start embracing fall? 🍂

FLOWER POWER BAYBEEEE 🌼 🌸

Just out here photosynthesizing and dancing every chance I get! ☀️

Lately I’ve been working on showing up for myself, especially on the days when I don’t want to. 💗

Keeping the little promises I make to myself, even when it’s hard.

This life is worth living.

Song: Sand Drawing by Judah Earl

Awww my editors found this little moment hiding in the vault 🥹💜

Protect the tiny gamers at all costs. 🫡

I think one of the biggest keys to showing up confidently as a streamer is getting comfortable with being your FULL self online.

Not a version of you that you think everyone will like, but authentically YOU!

Some people are going to absolutely love you. Some people won’t care at all. And some people might be triggered by something about you.

I’ve learned that the way someone reacts to a stranger simply existing confidently can say a whole lot more about what’s happening inside of them than it does about the person they’re criticizing.

You don’t have to make yourself smaller, quieter, cooler, prettier, less weird, or more palatable just to avoid somebody having an opinion about you.

People are going to have opinions anyway!!! LET THEM.

Might as well show up without shame and give the people who DO gel with you the chance to actually find you. 💜

I once heard grief explained as a ball bouncing around inside a box, with a button at the bottom.

When you first experience a loss, the box is tiny.

The ball doesn’t have very far to go before it hits that button… so it gets pressed over and over and over again.

And every time it does, it hurts all over again.

Grief isn’t only about losing someone we love.

We can grieve a family member, a friend, a relationship, a job, a chapter of our lives… even the version of our future we once thought we wanted.

Loss comes in so many forms.

And as time passes, I like to imagine that the box gets bigger.

Little by little, life begins growing around the grief.

You make new memories. You laugh again. You find more things to love. You experience entire days where that button doesn’t get pressed at all.

And then one day, sometimes completely out of nowhere…

the ball hits it again.

And it can still hurt just as deeply.

But now there is so much more space between those moments. ❤️

The love never leaves but the weight of the grief becomes easier to carry.

I think there’s something really comforting about that.

Me: plays Choicer Voicer once
Also me: Should I start a voice acting career?

LOL I havent seen Obsession yet, but I hear its very good!
How did I do??

I lost my sweet Ptah last week, and grief has a funny way of opening doors to rooms you thought you’d already walked through. ❤️

Losing him has reminded me of just how hard some of my other losses have been, and how easy it can be to disappear from the world when everything hurts.

But this time, I’m choosing to show up anyway.

Not because I’m okay. Not because I’m done grieving. But because I’m starting to understand that grief is really just evidence of how deeply we feel love.

And honestly… I’m also tired of the idea that we’re supposed to show up online only when life looks pretty.

Screw that.

I don’t want to only share the polished parts of being alive. I want to be a real person here. I want us to be able to say when something hurts, celebrate when something is wonderful, laugh when life gets ridiculous, and actually connect with each other through ALL of it.

Because if I’m going to have this weird, beautiful, heartbreaking human experience, I want the whole thing.

I want to enjoy the absolute privilege it is to love someone or something so much that losing them hurts.

I want to keep finding reasons to laugh after I’ve cried.

And for however much time I get to be here, I’m going to do everything in my power to have the best possible time while I can. ☀️

So I’m showing up.

Sad sometimes. Happy sometimes. Most likely a little chaotic sometimes.

But here to connect with you. ❤️

As you may know I’ve been building a little AI stream assistant named Mira. 💜

She helps me download streams, transcribes everything, find the best moments, and send clips straight to my editors… PLUS she helps me keep track of chatters, messages, and keep streams running smoothly.

The best part? I’ve made my clipping tool completely free over on GitHub if you want to try it yourself! I hope it can help you and make content easier to get online! ✨