New View General Contracting LLC

Y’all out here buying $700,000 houses with heated saltwater pools while somebody in North Philly just looked at an empty parking spot and thought, “That could hold at least 4,000 gallons.” Using three pallets, a Dollar General tarp, six zip ties, and confidence that should probably be studied by scientists, they’ve built what can only be described as an above ground municipal water park.

This ain’t just a pool. This is a declaration of independence. This is “the city said no, so I said watch this.” No permits. No inspections. No problem. The only filtration system is a kid named Ant throwing in another chlorine tablet every few hours.

The Mustang’s already double parked, someone’s aunt is tanning on a folding chair in the bike lane, and three guys who don’t even live on the block have somehow claimed ownership of the deep end.

By sunset there’ll be a Bluetooth speaker, two grills, seven coolers, and somebody insisting the water’s “warmer by the fire hydrant side.”

This isn’t a backyard pool. It’s North Philly engineering at its absolute peak. And somehow… it’ll still be open tomorrow.

200 carpenre st